Beartooth frontman Caleb Shomo opened up about the emotional moment he came out as a gay man to his wife of 14 years. He shared details of the conversation in an appearance on the Disrespectfully Podcast.
Shomo described the internal struggle he faced before finally deciding to speak up. He recalled how he pushed himself to have the conversation he had been putting off for a long time.
“I was in the shower trying to talk myself into saying something as I had been many times. And thankfully, I kind of smacked myself in the face. I was like, ‘It’s f*cking time,'” Shomo said.
He went on to explain how he broke the news to his then-wife, acknowledging that he had spent years suppressing his feelings.
“And then I said something to my then-wife about how I feel about men and how I never really allowed myself to explore this. But I have to tell you, I can’t not. And it was just a road from there,” he continued. “I never allowed myself to go down any of those roads to the best of my f*cking ability in my nondreaming state of mind. Doing every thing I can to just f*cking keep this at bay.”
Shomo also reflected on how emotionally overwhelming the moment was. He noted the difficulty he had putting his feelings into words.
“I was just bawling my f*cking eyes out, trying so hard to verbalize and I really struggle to verbalize things. And this is obviously such an intense thing, and I’m feeling so nervous and so scared in the situation that it was really, really difficult to verbalize, and I didn’t verbalize it very well,” he said. “I tried my best. I’m trying to give myself grace and understand it’s a journey.”
The private conversation with his wife was only the beginning of a much larger and more public journey for Shomo. It has since unfolded in front of fans and the wider rock community.
In late May, Shomo took the step of publicly coming out in a written statement. Loudwire reported that Shomo declared, “I am a proudly gay man,” describing the announcement as the result of years of “unpacking and reckoning” with his sexuality.
Following the public announcement, his wife of 14 years, Fleur Shomo, confirmed their divorce in a statement of her own. Coverage of the story described Fleur’s response as both heartbreaking and graceful, adding a profound emotional layer to the news.
In later remarks, Shomo also connected his years of suppression to his religious upbringing. Loudwire noted that he tied his long struggle with his identity to his past attempts to push those feelings aside, shaped in part by the beliefs he was raised with.
Shomo has framed his coming out as a step toward self-acceptance. He described it as part of a broader path toward what he called “self love.” For a frontman whose music has long explored themes of inner turmoil and personal struggle, the revelation has resonated deeply with fans of the band.
