Music journalist Mitch Lafon recently shared his opinions on why Metallica shouldn’t perform at the Super Bowl halftime show. This sparked an unexpected response from a fan who claims the band has been using a Lars Ulrich stand-in since 2022. The discussion took place on Mitch Lafon’s X account.
Lafon’s original statement focused on why Metallica wouldn’t be a good fit for the Super Bowl’s spectacle-driven format.
“Why I always say no to Metallica at The Super Bowl. Nobody needs to see Metallica lip synching with random dancers around them,” Lafon said. “A straight-up performance is not the spectacle the NFL wants and Metallica doing a choreographed Super Bowl performance is not what the band should be doing. It’s not the right fit.”
However, the conversation took an unexpected turn when a Metallica fan responded with an elaborate theory about the band’s drummer.
“You have to believe that the man playing drums is not Lars and has not been since him and his wife were arrested in November 2022 after the Zazula show in Florida,” the fan wrote. “The guy playing Lars has not taken his hat off since November 2022, lost the toothpick till Dubai of last year, does not promote Taipai Houston, has given all the PR work to James, has pointy ears, is older than Lars was, and is not the arrogant blanbermouth coke head asshole he usually is since November 2022.”
The fan continued with more detailed claims about the alleged substitution.
“I can go on, but no one believes it – all you have to do is cross-compare images from 2020 and 2022 to 2025 to see it’s a different person,” they continued. “He wasn’t even at Ozzy’s funeral bc it was private and for close friends and family only – which fake Lars is not. If you want cross comparison images I can share. They brought in the doppelganger bc they didn’t want to cancel the tour….too much money to be lost.”
The reality of Metallica’s recent activities tells a different story about the band’s continued success and Lars Ulrich’s active participation. These conspiracy theories circulate online despite this evidence.
The claims about arrests and stand-ins appear to be unfounded speculation. Metallica has never officially headlined a Super Bowl halftime show. Ulrich did participate in a brief tribute performance with an all-star ensemble during Super Bowl XXVII in 1993. The band’s relationship with major sporting events has remained limited. They prefer their own concert formats over choreographed television spectacles.
Ulrich was born December 26, 1963. He continues to tour actively with Metallica on their ongoing M72 World Tour. The tour has been a massive commercial success. Industry reports showed it grossed over $200 million by late 2025. This financial achievement contradicts the fan theory that the band would need to use a stand-in to avoid canceling lucrative tour dates.
The reference to Ozzy Osbourne’s funeral in the fan’s theory appears to relate to the private memorial service held for the metal icon in 2023. The service was indeed limited to close family and friends. This made attendance by any Metallica member unlikely regardless of their relationship with Osbourne. The private nature of the ceremony explains the absence of many rock musicians who knew Osbourne professionally.
The fan theory remains unsubstantiated and appears to be speculation based on perceived changes in the drummer’s appearance and behavior. Such conspiracy theories are common in fan communities. They often arise from natural changes in appearance over time or different camera angles and lighting conditions during performances.
